These tech-centric jokes,
song parodies, anecdotes and assorted humor have been collected from friends and
websites across the Internet. This humor is light-hearted and sometimes slightly
offensive to the easily-offended, so you are forewarned. It is all workplace-safe.
Over five thousand years ago, Moses said to the
children of Israel, "Pick up your shovels, mount your asses and camels, and I will
lead you to the Promised Land." Nearly 75 years ago, Roosevelt said, "Lay down your
shovels, sit on your asses, and light up a
is the Promised Land." Today, the Government has stolen your shovel, taxed your
asses, raised the price of Camels and mortgaged the Promised Land! I was so depressed
last night thinking about Health Care, the economy, the wars, lost jobs, savings,
Social Security, retirement funds... that I called a Suicide Hotline. I had to press
1 for English. I was connected to a call center in Pakistan. I told them I
was suicidal. They got excited and asked, "Can
you drive a truck?"