These engineering and science tech-centric
jokes, song parodies, anecdotes and assorted humor have been collected from friends
and websites across the Internet. I check back occasionally for new fodder, but
it seems all the old content is reappearing all over (like this is). The humor is
light-hearted and clean and sometimes slightly assaultive to the easily-offended,
so you are forewarned. It is all workplace-safe.
Over five thousand years ago, Moses said to the
children of Israel, "Pick up your shovels, mount your asses and camels, and I will
lead you to the Promised Land." Nearly 75 years ago, Roosevelt said, "Lay down your
shovels, sit on your asses, and light up a
Camel, this
is the Promised Land." Today, the Government has stolen your shovel, taxed your
asses, raised the price of Camels and mortgaged the Promised Land! I was so depressed
last night thinking about Health Care, the economy, the wars, lost jobs, savings,
Social Security, retirement funds... that I called a Suicide Hotline. I had to press
1 for English. I was connected to a call center in Pakistan. I told them I
was suicidal. They got excited and asked, "Can
you drive a truck?"
RF Cafe began life in 1996 as "RF Tools"
in an AOL screen name web space totaling 2 MB. Its primary purpose was to provide
me with ready access to commonly needed formulas and reference material while performing
my work as an RF system and circuit design engineer. The World Wide Web (Internet)
was largely an unknown entity at the time and bandwidth was a scarce commodity.
Dial-up modems blazed along at 14.4 kbps while tying up your telephone line,
and a lady's voice announced "You've Got Mail" when a new message arrived...
Over five thousand years ago, Moses said to the
children of Israel, "Pick up your shovels, mount your asses and camels, and I will
lead you to the Promised Land." Nearly 75 years ago, Roosevelt said, "Lay down your
shovels, sit on your asses, and light up a
Camel, this
is the Promised Land." Today, the Government has stolen your shovel, taxed your
asses, raised the price of Camels and mortgaged the Promised Land! I was so depressed
last night thinking about Health Care, the economy, the wars, lost jobs, savings,
Social Security, retirement funds... that I called a Suicide Hotline. I had to press
1 for English. I was connected to a call center in Pakistan. I told them I
was suicidal. They got excited and asked, "Can
you drive a truck?" 
