You're Probably an Engineer If...

• The only jokes you receive are through e-mail
• At Christmas, it goes without saying that you will be the one to find the burnt-out bulb in the string
• Buying flowers for your girlfriend or spending the money to upgrade your RAM is a moral dilemma
• Everyone else on the Alaskan cruise is on deck peering at the scenery, and you are still on a personal tour of the engine room
• In college you thought Spring Break was a metal fatigue failure
• The salespeople at Circuit City can't answer any of your questions
• You are always late to meetings
• You are at an air show and know how fast the skydivers are falling
• You bought your wife a new CD ROM for her birthday
• You can quote scenes from any Monty Python movie
• You can type 70 words a minute but can't read your own handwriting
• You can't write unless the paper has both horizontal and vertical lines.
• You comment to your wife that her straight hair is nice and parallel.
• You forgot to get a haircut ... for 6 months
• You go on the rides at Disneyland and sit backwards in the chairs to see how they do the special effects
• You have Dilbert comics displayed anywhere in your work area
• You have ever saved the power cord from a broken appliance
• You have more friends on the Internet than in real life
• You have never bought any new underwear or socks for yourself since you got married
• You have used coat hangers and duct tape for something other than hanging coats and taping ducts
• You know what https:// actually stands for
• You look forward to Christmas only to put together the kids' toys
• You own one or more white short-sleeve dress shirts
• You see a good design and still have to change it
• You spent more on your calculator than on your wedding ring
• You still own a slide rule and you know how to work it
• You think that when people around you yawn, it's because they didn't get enough sleep
• You wear black socks with white tennis shoes (or vice versa)
• You window shop at Radio Shack
• You're in the back seat of your car, she's looking wistfully at the moon, and you're trying to locate a geosynchronous satellite
• You know what the geosynchronous satellite function is
• Your checkbook always balances
• Your laptop computer costs more than your car
• Your wife hasn't the foggiest idea what you do at work
• Your wrist watch has more computing power than a 300 MHz Pentium
• You've already calculated how much you make per second
• You've ever tried to repair a $5 radio
• Your computer is worth more than your vehicles.

         ...author unknown.