These engineering and science tech-centric
jokes, song parodies, anecdotes and assorted humor have been collected from friends
and websites across the Internet. I check back occasionally for new fodder, but
it seems all the old content is reappearing all over (like this is). The humor is
light-hearted and clean and sometimes slightly assaultive to the easily-offended,
so you are forewarned. It is all workplace-safe.
- Your co-worker has 8 body piercing and none are visible.
- You make over $300,000 a year and still can't afford a house.
- You take a bus and are shocked at two people carrying on a conversation
- Your child's 3rd-grade teacher has purple hair, a nose ring,
and is named Breeze.
- You have a very strong opinion about where your coffee beans
- You know which restaurant serves the freshest arugula.
- You can't remember.....is pot illegal?
- A really great parking space can totally move you to tears.
- A low speed police pursuit will interrupt ANY TV broadcast.
- Gas costs $1.00 per gallon more than anywhere else in the U.S.
- Unlike back home, the guy at 8:30 am at Starbucks wearing the
baseball cap and sunglasses who looks like Bruce Willis IS Bruce
- Your car insurance costs as much as your house payment.
- You have to leave the big company meeting early because Billy
Blanks himself is teaching the 4:00 pm Tae Bo class.
- You pass an elementary school playground and the children are
all busy with their cell phones or pagers.
- It's barely sprinkling rain outside, so you leave for work an
hour early to avoid all the weather-related accidents.
- Both you AND your dog have therapists.
- You're thinking of taking an adult class but you can't decide
between aroma therapy or conversational mandarin.
- You call 911 and they put you on hold.
- You keep a list of companies to boycott.
- You've been to a baby shower that has two mothers and a sperm
- You give a "thumbs up" gesture to a car with a FREE TIBET bumper
sticker -- and you mean it.
- You realize the only Republicans you know are your aunt and
uncle in Michigan.