These tech-centric jokes,
song parodies, anecdotes and assorted humor have been collected from friends and
websites across the Internet. This humor is light-hearted and sometimes slightly
offensive to the easily-offended, so you are forewarned. It is all workplace-safe.
of Melanie's old (and getting older...) college friends posted this list on Facebook. There is evidently no end
to the amount of cleverness out there. Enjoy.
- I tried to catch some fog. I mist.
- When chemists die, they barium.
- Math professors are sum worshipers.
- I know a guy who's addicted to brake fluid. He says he can stop anytime.
- I stayed up all night to see where the sun went. Then it dawned on me.
- I put my root beer in a square cup. Now it's just beer.
- This girl said she recognized me from the vegetarian club, but I'd never met herbivore.
- I'm reading a book about anti-gravity. I can't put it down.
- They told me I had Type A blood, but it was a Type O.
- PMS jokes aren't funny. Period.
* √☺ = ☺
- We're going on a class trip to the Coca Cola factory. I hope there's no pop quiz.
- Energizer Bunny arrested: Charged with battery.
- What do organic mathematicians throw in their fireplaces? Natural logs.
- How do you make holy water? Boil the hell out of it.
- About all I know about algebra is that 1 + 1 = 2. [that's not algebra]
- What do you call a dinosaur with an extensive vocabulary? A thesaurus.
- When you get a bladder infection, urine trouble.
- What does a clock do when it's hungry? It goes back four seconds.
- Broken pencils are pointless.
- Well, another day has passed. I haven't used algebra once.
- Math is 3 difficult 4 me.
- I have always given 100% at work: 15% on Monday, 23% on Tuesday, 40% on Wednesday, 12% on Thursday, and
10% on Friday.
- Some magnetics engineers are reluctant to cosine a loan.
- I used to hate math, but then I realized decimals have a point.
- Never drink and derive.
Posted January 29, 2015